Most people — from the staunchly single to the happily married — will tell you dating is a game of luck: you either score a lifelong guarantee of regular boinking, or a toilet bowl full of vomit, a head full of migraine, and foggy memories of bad foreplay. But while a Tinder picture may be worth a thousand words, real words (aka adult conversations) are worth much more: they help you separate the normals from the grade-A freaks.
Need receipts? Take that New York Times article where acquaintances sat through 36 questions and were rewarded with a happy relationship. Or dating sites like OkCupid, which use a series of equally revealing albeit less probing questions to find matches for their users. A&E's hit show, Married At First Sight, uses a team of professionals — including a sexologist, a psychologist, a sociologist, and a spiritual advisor — to create what they believe are three perfect couples, based on scientific matchmaking.
So where does that leave the amateurs? Not everyone has a panel of experts to guide them from their secret Pinterest wedding boards all the way to their I Dos. Most people bumble along from one bathroom hookup to the next before landing a guaranteed make-out partner. They're looking for love in all the wrong dive bars.
So help them out: what question do you wish you'd asked before getting into a relationship? What's the one sentence that would've saved you a lot of pain, or at least a lot of time? No one wants to invest three years of meaningful doing it before finding out their partner's an anti-vaxxer.
Share the questions you did (or didn't) ask, and tune in to the season 2 premiere of Married At First Sight on March 17 at 9 PM ET.
Image by Jacob Inferrera.
Nandita Raghuram is a freelance journalist living in Brooklyn.